Sans Culottes

The first thing of importance is that I always spell the words “culottes” and “exercise” incorrectly.  It is only after multiple tries that I spell them correctly. There is certainly something of great significance to this fact.   Culottes and exercise both spelled incorrectly?  Very suspicious. 

From a quick and brief internet search, it would seem that the word “culottes”, which is French and thus certainly should be pronounced cool-la, first referred to what would now probably be called knickers.  They were worn by men, but were nothing like what we would think of as culottes today.

Hey...I spelled it right the first time!  Maybe there is hope for culottes!

What we currently think of as culottes (I did it again!), or a split skirt, was invented in the Victorian era so that ladies could ride horses facing forward, instead of side saddle. So, the general idea behind their development was to be able to do an activity while maintaining a certain level of modesty and a desire to wear femininely styled clothes, which is a good idea.  Being modest and ladylike is good and biblical.

That is all fine, but what about culottes among fundamental Baptists?  When are they appropriate?

For me, personally, when almost no one will see me.  That is the good time for culottes, in the cover of darkness and when no else is around.  In other words, I wear them to bed.

For some guys, when they play basketball.  Have you seen some of the basketball shorts lately?  Some people might call them culottes.

But for others, they have a broader range of appropriate times for culottes.  And I think they have the same motive as those horse riding ladies back in the time of Queen Victoria.  And that is a good thing.

Yet, there are some problems with culottes.  These are just my observations and opinions, take them or leave them.  But, maybe, think about them.

The first one is that, from my fundamental girl Baptist sport observations, I think a lady could do just about anything modestly, outside of riding a horse, in skirt.  The skirt just has to be long enough and full enough to allow motion.  The right skirt, and I have quite a few of these, works well for just about any activity.

The second one is that culottes are no more modest than a skirt.   I have seen skirts go flying and I have seen culottes go flying.  It is going to happen, does not happen all that often if the right kind of skirt is worn, but it is not the end of the world.  Bottom line, the right skirt is just as modest as any pair of culottes.

The third one is that many culottes are just long shorts or short pants in disguise.  If a guy would not have a problem wearing your culottes (minus the cutesy fabric), then I think there is a problem.  They are simply not modest or feminine, and that is not good.

So, “to wear or not to wear?”, that is the question.  Make some observations, consider mine, put biblical principles in practice, and decide.

The Truth Behind Church Cleaning

So, why should I sign up to clean the church?  Is there a biblical basis for this ministry?  What are the blessings behind putting your name on those lines, then spending a few hours cleaning the church?

The first verse that came to my mind to address this issue was Psalm 84:10, “I had rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God, than to dwell in the tents of wickedness.”  Realizing that this verse did not exactly apply to cleaning the church, I did a search for “doorkeeper” in the Bible.  This word is only used thrice in the KJV, in Psalm 84 and 1 Chronicles 15:23-24.  It is in the 1 Chronicles passage that a little connection to church cleaning was found.  Different Hebrew words were both translated “doorkeeper”, but the word used in 1 Chronicles 15 is often translated “porter.”  The connection to church cleaning?  Well, Strong suggests “janitor” as a definition for this word.  According to Strong, these Levites, Berechiah, Elkanah, Obed–edom, and Jehiah, were janitors!  And we all know what janitors do - they clean!

1 Chronicles 9 also uses this word, though translated “porter” a number of times to describe Levites serving around the house of the Lord.  You can look up the whole passage, but verses 23-32 state,

“So they and their children had the oversight of the gates of the house of the LORD, namely, the house of the tabernacle, by wards.  In four quarters were the porters, toward the east, west, north, and south.  And their brethren, which were in their villages, were to come after seven days from time to time with them.  For these Levites, the four chief porters, were in their set office, and were over the chambers and treasuries of the house of God.

And they lodged round about the house of God, because the charge was upon them, and the opening thereof every morning pertained to them.  And certain of them had the charge of the ministering vessels, that they should bring them in and out by tale.  Some of them also were appointed to oversee the vessels, and all the instruments of the sanctuary, and the fine flour, and the wine, and the oil, and the frankincense, and the spices.  And some of the sons of the priests made the ointment of the spices.  And Mattithiah, one of the Levites, who was the firstborn of Shallum the Korahite, had the set office over the things that were made in the pans.  And other of their brethren, of the sons of the Kohathites, were over the shewbread, to prepare it every sabbath.”

Is it obvious that their main occupations were opening the gates, taking care of the vessels and instruments, and making ointment?  I think the answer is “yes.”  That is what the Bible says they did.  But what is behind those jobs?  What else would be required to have the oversight of an ancient Oriental gate with its chambers, vessels, and instruments?  Cleaning, of course!  It would seem that these Levites, servants of the Most High God, would also have performed janitorial duties.  In other words, they signed up to clean the church.

So, since New Testament believers are described as a “royal priesthood,” would it not be appropriate to follow the example of these Levite porters who contributed to the cleaning of the gates?  I think the answer is “yes.”

What do you think?  

Now for some of the blessings of church cleaning.

The most important thing to remember is that the more times you sign up, the less you actually clean.  That is what happened to me.  Due to some circumstances which I will not explain, I decided to sign up for church cleaning twice as often as I normally would have.  What happened?  I cleaned less!  The key to this is to “accidentally” sign up on days where other people end up cleaning.  Really, this takes skill.  All you have to do is randomly put you name on the lines and….amazing….you end up signed up for days after campouts, weddings, Christmas banquets, etc.  What looks like disaster and church cleaning chaos turns into a blessing!  There are lots of people around and lots of cleaning gets done.  If I am recalling correctly, one time I did not end up cleaning at all.  Now, that was not my goal, I wanted to help clean, but many willing hands and hearts finished the job before I was able to do my part.

So, my suggestion is, sign up more, clean less.

There are other blessings to cleaning the church as well.  One Is that you get to hear Miss Swinson sing as she vacuums and cleans this bathrooms.  This is much better than listening to myself sing as I do such things.  You also get to learn Nicole’s tricks concerning the sweeping of the stairs.  You wonder how the Johnsons can clean so much of the church in such a short amount of time.  You learn that Britney’s territory is the auditorium and the offices, so you move on to better and smaller areas.  You find people’s lost Bibles and, as you put them the lost and found cupboard, are thankful that yours is not in there with the sweatshirts and trumpets and devotion notebooks.  You get to pray for people as you vacuum “their” pews, that is, if you get to the auditorium before Britney does.  You also are grateful for the many others who clean on the days you do not sign up.  But mostly, you are thankful for the opportunity to simply and humbly serve the Lord.